So excited to read these recs! I also did a scary thing and told a story in front of 200 people with out notes! I was terrified but thrilled to have done it. Let’s keep doing scary shit!
I have had to learn to make a decision. To say "yes" when I feel called to it, not because I am being pressured or afraid. And "no"when it does not feel right or I need healthy boundaries, not falling into outer expectations. I have needed to learn both! Instead of my fears or others making a decision for me.
Yes! It's also a learning experience differentiating when I'm afraid of something just because it's new or there is some level of vulnerability or risk involved vs. when I'm afraid of missing out or disappointing someone, etc. I think sometimes it's reasonable for fear to be a factor in decision making, but it doesn't need to be in the driver's seat.
I now automatically say no to stuff, but not from being scared, (well maybe a little scared), but from learning the "no" word the hard way, from my presbyterian elder/staff days of automatically saying "yes" to all things asked presbyterian-ly of me because you don't turn down a god job, right?
I finally learned, crash and burn style, that god is ok with it.
That makes sense! I also have a long history of people pleasing and saying yes to a lot of things that weren't good for me but benefited other people and no to things that would have suited me better.
So now I'm learning how to say yes for me, which definitely feels different, because there's not always the same encouragement or pressure that comes with those kind of yeses - which might be part of why they can feel so scary.
Thanks for sharing this beautiful illustration of the goodness that can come from stepping out of one's comfort zone into the stretch zone. So glad it yielded such rich reward for you (and others). Inspiring for this highly anxious, highly sensitive reader :)
I love how you mention the "stretch zone" because, of course, the more you stretch, the easier it gets, and I think that's such a great reminder as well - that our range of comfort can grow.
This is amazing A. Last year while unemployed I spent a lot of time at the library with my daughter and my eyes were opened to just how many programs and creative outlets the library put on. I attended one of their craft sessions on making lotions and was pleasantly surprised at the diversity of attendees, women and men, older and younger. Good on you for starting and expanding!
What a fun club! I want to come but it would be quite the commute, lol! This piece resonates with me so much. I fear trying new things or venturing out of my comfort zone and this latest phase of my life has made it all too easy to slip back into hermit like habits.
You'd be so welcome! Perhaps there's something similar at your own local library?
I definitely understand that fear, and how easy it is to fall back into what's comfortable. I have noticed it does get easier the more steps you take outside of that comfort zone, so I'm trying to focus on small ones to start.
Thank you for sharing this. It feels timely for me, as I am doing so much that feels scary right now. But…what if it goes right, even if it is different than what I expected? Such a good question to come back to 💕
It's hard to be vulnerable and take risks (even if they might feel small to others)! Opportunities aren't guarantees, but almost nothing is ever guaranteed, so I will keep reminding myself that good outcomes are just as possible as bad ones, and also it's rarely ever just one or the other. That is strangely comforting.
It is 100% hard to be vulnerable and wonder if anyone will show up or want what we’re putting out into the universe! And even the outcomes we didn’t expect or want have something to teach us if we let it.
Thanks for taking the leap to help build community! When we say it takes a village, we often forget that it sometimes means leading things and doing things that are out of our comfort zones a little. I'm so grateful to libraries for providing a third space for us all!
So excited to read these recs! I also did a scary thing and told a story in front of 200 people with out notes! I was terrified but thrilled to have done it. Let’s keep doing scary shit!
Yes! 🎉
I have had to learn to make a decision. To say "yes" when I feel called to it, not because I am being pressured or afraid. And "no"when it does not feel right or I need healthy boundaries, not falling into outer expectations. I have needed to learn both! Instead of my fears or others making a decision for me.
Yes! It's also a learning experience differentiating when I'm afraid of something just because it's new or there is some level of vulnerability or risk involved vs. when I'm afraid of missing out or disappointing someone, etc. I think sometimes it's reasonable for fear to be a factor in decision making, but it doesn't need to be in the driver's seat.
I now automatically say no to stuff, but not from being scared, (well maybe a little scared), but from learning the "no" word the hard way, from my presbyterian elder/staff days of automatically saying "yes" to all things asked presbyterian-ly of me because you don't turn down a god job, right?
I finally learned, crash and burn style, that god is ok with it.
Yes. No. I mean "no".
Then the pondering begins.
Kinda like you.
That makes sense! I also have a long history of people pleasing and saying yes to a lot of things that weren't good for me but benefited other people and no to things that would have suited me better.
So now I'm learning how to say yes for me, which definitely feels different, because there's not always the same encouragement or pressure that comes with those kind of yeses - which might be part of why they can feel so scary.
Thanks for sharing this beautiful illustration of the goodness that can come from stepping out of one's comfort zone into the stretch zone. So glad it yielded such rich reward for you (and others). Inspiring for this highly anxious, highly sensitive reader :)
I love how you mention the "stretch zone" because, of course, the more you stretch, the easier it gets, and I think that's such a great reminder as well - that our range of comfort can grow.
Congrats on taking the leap (and surrounding yourself with people who encourage you to say yes to opportunities that might be good for you)! :)
Thank you! I'm definitely lucky to have people close to me who believe in and encourage me.
This is amazing A. Last year while unemployed I spent a lot of time at the library with my daughter and my eyes were opened to just how many programs and creative outlets the library put on. I attended one of their craft sessions on making lotions and was pleasantly surprised at the diversity of attendees, women and men, older and younger. Good on you for starting and expanding!
I always thought the library was wonderful, but I really had no idea how much they offer! I love that you're connected to your library too!
What a fun club! I want to come but it would be quite the commute, lol! This piece resonates with me so much. I fear trying new things or venturing out of my comfort zone and this latest phase of my life has made it all too easy to slip back into hermit like habits.
You'd be so welcome! Perhaps there's something similar at your own local library?
I definitely understand that fear, and how easy it is to fall back into what's comfortable. I have noticed it does get easier the more steps you take outside of that comfort zone, so I'm trying to focus on small ones to start.
Thanks so much for linking to my post, it’s lovely to know it resonates with other people
It definitely did!
Thank you for sharing this. It feels timely for me, as I am doing so much that feels scary right now. But…what if it goes right, even if it is different than what I expected? Such a good question to come back to 💕
It's hard to be vulnerable and take risks (even if they might feel small to others)! Opportunities aren't guarantees, but almost nothing is ever guaranteed, so I will keep reminding myself that good outcomes are just as possible as bad ones, and also it's rarely ever just one or the other. That is strangely comforting.
It is 100% hard to be vulnerable and wonder if anyone will show up or want what we’re putting out into the universe! And even the outcomes we didn’t expect or want have something to teach us if we let it.
Thanks for taking the leap to help build community! When we say it takes a village, we often forget that it sometimes means leading things and doing things that are out of our comfort zones a little. I'm so grateful to libraries for providing a third space for us all!
Yes! I always thought libraries seemed so magical (still true) but they also felt intimidating to me, and I'm so glad I've been able to get past that.
Thanks so much for the share 🙏🏻 Here’s to taking the leap!
I'm looking forward to listening further! Thanks for reading!